It seems to me that at the age of 18, love feels especially vivid. You're still learning to understand yourself, your feelings, and what kind of relationship you really deserve. I used to think that love is when a person is constantly around, writes to you every minute, is jealous and afraid of losing you. Now I'm starting to realize that true love doesn't have to be loud at all. Sometimes it manifests itself in simple things: when people listen to you, when they remember what is important to you, when they respect your boundaries and don't force you to become someone else.I no longer want to believe that for the sake of love you have to endure pain, constantly prove your worth, or give up on yourself. I want a relationship where I can be real—laugh, cry, have my own opinion, my own dreams, and my own personal space. For me, love is not the loss of myself in another person, but the opportunity to remain myself next to him.

For me, sexuality is not about meeting someone's expectations or necessarily looking defiant. For a long time I thought that sexuality was solely about appearance: a certain figure, clothes, makeup, and look. Now I perceive it much more broadly. For me, this is primarily a feeling of my own body, my desires, boundaries, and the right to decide for myself what suits me.For me, sexuality is not about meeting someone's expectations or necessarily looking defiant. For a long time I thought that sexuality was solely about appearance: a certain figure, clothes, makeup, and look. Now I perceive it much more broadly. For me, this is primarily a feeling of my own body, my desires, boundaries, and the right to decide for myself what suits me.

I think one of the most difficult things at the age of 18 is learning to accept yourself. There are too many other people's opinions, beautiful photos, perfect images, and constant comparisons. Sometimes I look at other girls and think that everything is better with them: looks, figure, style, confidence, life. And then I realize that I'm comparing my real life to what I see only from the outside.I'm gradually learning to treat myself more gently. I have days when I like myself, and there are days when I want to hide from mirrors and not notice anything about myself at all. And that's probably okay. Self-acceptance does not mean that I have to consider myself perfect every day. For me, it's more of an ability to say, "Yes, I am like that. I can change things about myself if I want to, but I don't have to hate myself until I'm perfect.

I've been thinking for a long time that being myself is just saying what you think and doing what you want to do. But it's actually much more complicated than that. Sometimes it's very scary to show others your real self, because there's always the possibility that they won't understand, judge, or ridicule you. At the age of 18, it is especially easy to depend on other people's opinions. I want people to like me, look confident, say the right things and not accidentally show my weaknesses.But I'm increasingly thinking that it's impossible to live your life by constantly adjusting to other people's expectations. If I like certain clothes, I want to wear them. If I want to be creative, I want to try, even if someone says I can't do it. If I have an opinion, I want to have the right to express it. And just because I'm afraid of something doesn't mean I have to give it up forever.For me, courage now is not the absence of fear.